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I met my wife when I wasn't looking. She was there, we became friends, and months later I fell head over heels for her. We had not had sex. I farm a lttle. It has been my experience that when I want to grow a crop, I have to plant some good seed, then wait.

If I dig the seeds up to how they are doing -nothing. If I piss on them they die. Be who you are. A father? Be the best father you can be. You are divorced? More failure? Okay, so it sucks to be alone. Really it does! I like you have been beaten down. I'm tired. I don't want to go through all the getting to know someone al the dating does that say to someone?

It says that I am self-centered, and not concerned about anyone but myself. I want a relationship for pleasing myself Is that what I really want to tell someone? MORE important is that who I really am? If that is who I am then I better work at improving myself first before looking for someone. When I sell a house I cut the grass, paint the house. Fix up, clean up, freshen up, improve. Replace the windows? When I get finished -it is a place I would want to live.

If you were a woman; would you want to date you, knowing all the secrets of yourself? Instead of wondering what is wrong with them, and being desparate -become the person a woman can't live without. I know it is a tall order but look at your self from someone -'s eyes. Become all you can be You have good things about yourself, develope them more. Good luck to both of us. It was too broad a law to be upheld as is. I just think it minimizes the of in others minds, by comparing their - to. I agree with one part of your post, though: I do think that people often jump into marriage prematurely.

It seems to me that a minimum of two years should have gone by before a couple is ready to make that commitment, and even then, engagements are not such a bad thing. There are exceptions, of course, but mostly because you can put up a front for a while, but two years is a LOOOONG time to fake someone out.

Also, in two years, you get to the other person in a wide variety of situations, how they react to life's ups and downs, and gradually decide if this is what you want. Humans are certainly capable of such a feat at least, last time I checked, I was human. I think you're looking at it backwards, though. Getting married is a big decision, certainly. Marriage is not created by the church or the justice of the peace. It's a creation of the two people that are in it.

As as they are both willing to work on their creation, make it better and make adjustments when it needs to change, and VALUE that creation, that marriage thrive. Has his 11 year old daughter who you are oh so close with ed yet? Way to reel in the whole family! They are probably trying to keep you from jumping on the edge and going bonkers. Or maybe you are just way too pushy and demanding. Now look, he broke up with you. What a shocker. If you really care about him, give him his space. Hello all Looking to find a "friend" in the large and in charge women catagory.

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